Happy Birthday Emmy!

Two years ago yesterday I said to my good friend R something along the lines of "At least she will stay in until May; I can't afford a diamond baby."

Less than two hours later Jon pulled up to a stop sign in Saline, MI and I turn to him and said "either my water just broke or I wet my pants and I am pretty sure I didn't have to go to the bathroom."

Unwilling to accept that my water had broken so early I made him continue home. After all, I had a roast in the crock pot and I didn't want to waste it... I love roast.

We drove the rest of the way home with little incident, making a few phone calls along the way.

When we got home Jon said "Take out the roast, get everything we need and we will go to the hospital."

"No." I replied, "Even if my water did break I am always in labor for hours... give the kids baths and I will make potatoes." I was determined to eat that roast.

While Jon was giving Eli and Bel baths the contractions started. Not those pesky early labor contractions, but those "Holy shit I can't walk and talk and breathe while these are going on" kind.

So, I suggested to Jon that we should probably start the 30 minute drive to the hospital.

We dropped the kids off at B & K's (who were our saviors multiple times during our Ann Arbor lives) and headed to U of M for what was clearly going to be the birth of our "diamond baby".

Why do I ever speak?!?

When we arrived at the hospital I was told that my water hadn't broken, I rolled my eyes at the triage nurse and said, "I promise you my water has broken."

"Well, according the test I just performed there is no amniotic fluid present. However, you appear to be having pretty steady contractions, so let's just check you out."

I was admitted less than 5 minutes letter dilated to a 5. Oh and did I mention that the exam showed that my amniotic sac was not intact... REALLY!?!

I should preface the next part of the story with how pleasant early labor with Eli was. I had my epidural at 6 and I was hardly aware of the contractions. However, post epidural labor was not so pleasant, leaving me with the desire to attempt an undedicated labor with Emmy. After all, this was baby number three; I was an old pro at this whole birthing thing.

So, on the way to my room I told my L&D nurse that I wanted to attempt an unmedicated labor. I told her that I am not totally sold on it, but I want to give it a shot.

What an enormous mistake! Ten minutes later I am at a 6 and begging for that epidural. I couldn't get it fast enough. I didn't even care that they had to stick me twice.

A few hours later, I looked at the clock and smiled... It was 12:01. This meant that I was going to have another emerald baby. An hour and 53 minutes later at 1:54 am, Emmy graced us with her presence.

The good news: Little Miss Emmy was born on May Day, my very favorite holiday.

The bad news: I spent my 31st birthday in the NICU watching my May Day baby struggle to breath. Strangely that was my best birthday ever. As I have mentioned in a previous post, May 2nd, 2007 was the day Emmy's toes turned pink.

I am very lucky to have such a happy and healthy two year old. It is because of her that my life is complete. Isobel and Eli started our family, but Emmy completed it... in many ways. She is such an amazing person. In fact, it is almost impossible to look at her and not smile.

Happy Birthday, my sweet baby girl! We love you!

Just in case you were wondering... I never did get to eat the roast.

Welcome...

This morning, shortly after 8:00, my family welcomed its newest member. We are happy to have him here, but wish he would have continued to call my sisters uterus home just a little longer, perhaps 7 weeks longer...

I am heartbroken that my sister has to live through this experience. Emmy was nowhere near this early and I remember the emptiness and pain that I suffered. The idea that Michelle's experience will be even more trying is unbearable. The saving grace is that I know my sister is a strong person and she will rise to the NICU challenge with grace and dignity.

If you would like to see some pictures of my gorgeous new nephew, you can do so here. I have to say, he is a lucky boy to get all that cute, curly, black hair. I guess if there was ever any question as to whether my sister and I are really related, they were answered when we had children. Isobel looks like Michelle and Ben looks like me... I wonder if this is the Universes way of telling us, or at least me, to leave the past in the past.

one and counting...

Today is Emmy's first birthday.

I was lying in bed at about 2:00 this morning thinking that one year before, at about that time, I was in my hospital bed willing my epidural away so I could be with Emmy in the NICU. They rushed her out of the room so quickly that I didn't even get to see her. I finally met her at about 5:00 am, 3 weeks and 1 day before I should have. It was a long night followed by a long day.

The needles, the tube feeding, the pumping, the C-Pap, I remember it all as if it were yesterday. I remember looking at her little blue toes and being so afraid that they would never be pink. In fact, I can honestly say that the best birthday gift I ever received was Emmy's pink toes. Once every part of her was nice and pink, I knew she was going to be okay.

I am very lucky, that she only spent a week in the hospital. Whenever I think about how scared I was, I think about the other parents in the NICU. There was a little boy who stopped breathing every time he slept, a little girl who was born at 26 weeks and a set of twins that had been there for 2 months and weren't going home anytime soon. All of the babies on her unit were there when she got there and there when she left. I think about them often.

The last night we were in general peds Emmy got a new roomie, an adorable little baby boy. During his four week check up the doctor felt something in his abdomen. A sonogram later confirmed a mass in his colon. He was immediately admitted to the hospital for further testing. His parents were fantastic. They tried for so long to have a baby and were finally blessed with this wonderful little boy. They were so kind and optimistic. I will always remember how genuinely happy they were when Emmy was released from the hospital. I would have liked to have known more about them and learned the outcome of their son’s tests. I often think about that little boy and hope that he is better and was able to celebrate his first birthday with his parents.

Although I sometimes complain about my children (and often offer to give them away), I know how lucky I am. Eli and Emmy both spent a little time in the NICU, but they both recovered nicely and quickly. They are currently healthy children and I am a better person for knowing them.

It is days like today, when my baby girl is turning one, that I realize how important friends and family really are. So, take a moment and think about the last time that you hugged someone you loved for no reason. If you can't remember, now is a good time, because who knows what tomorrow will bring.